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Get Off Your Butt

Wednesday, August 27th, 2008

Please Note: This is a guest post by Marcus Smith, read more of his posts at his blog.

If you would like to write a guest post, get extra traffic and exposure for your blog, click here.  Once again I would like to thank Marcus for submitting this great post.  Now on to the post…

First of all let’s get this out of the way.  I love to read.  I live to bounce ideas off other people. If I didn’t brainstorm I’d probably die.  I agree that process maps bring clarity to any endeavor.  I know that planned courses of action are absolutely necessary for extended success.

These things are all well and good.  They all have their place in a successful lifestyle.

All the planning, brainstorming, and process mapping in the world won’t amount to anything if you fail to get off your butt and take measurable action.

For the rest of this article I will open your eyes to what it takes to see a personal project/task/undertaking through to a successful end.  I’ve used these methods to shed 50 lbs of fat, create powerful business connections, attract clients into my business, and build traffic to my website.

Create Blocks of Time

Everybody wants to get in better shape.  Most people want to be millionaires/billionaires.  A select few want to be the rock, paper, scissors champion of the world.

It really doesn’t matter what you aspire to be.  If you don’t make the time to do so it will never ever happen.  Oftentimes we don’t get what we want because we haven’t set the time to do it.

For years I struggled with my weight.  I wasn’t morbidly obese but I was still overweight.  At my worst I tipped the scales at 252 lbs and I sported a 40” waist.  When I walked the friction of my thighs would create tear at my pants and underwear.  For years and years I whined and complained about the issue.  I’d get on a “health kick” and watch my weight go back and forth.   The weight would always came back.

One day in late 2006 I made a change.  I decided that Monday through Friday between  5:30 – 7:00 PM was my work out time. That hour and a half was non-negotiable.

If I was working I stopped and worked out.  If someone wanted to make plans, no matter who it was, they had to wait until 7:00 PM.  I drove to the gym during thunderstorms, hailstorms, and traffic jams.

As soon as I set that non negotiable 1.5 hour time period I noticed a change in my body.  Those unwanted pounds grew wings and flew away.

Setting non-negotiable times for action is the first step to getting off your butt.  Good habits (like bad ones) are incredibly hard to break.

Set Goals

A google search of the term “setting goals” returns 4.17 million results.  My personal favorite is the tried and true classic S.M.A.R.T. goals system.

Let’s use the goal “I want to speak to 4 unique audiences in 2008” to show how S.M.A.R.T. goals work.

Specific  – Being vague will absolutely kill you.  I want to improve in public speaking is a vague goal.  I want to speak to 4 different audiences in 2008 is a specific goal.

Measurable – If you say you want to speak to 4 different audiences then you can measure your success or failure.  It’s an easy thing to do.  If you manage to get in front of 4 audiences you’ve succeeded.  If you don’t then you haven’t.

Attainable – I agree that we should all aim for the stars.  However, you can’t go to outer space if you don’t have a spaceship.  When setting goals do yourself a favor and set reasonable ones.  There is nothing more deflating than setting a goal and failing because your goal wasn’t realistic.  There’s a big difference between speaking to 4 unique audiences in2008 and speaking to 50.

Realistic – Setting a goal that you can meet is a good idea.  You have to take an inventory of your skills, available time, and motivation to achieve the goal in order to be realistic.  If you have the requisite skills, time, and motivation then the goal is realistic.  Setting goals that are outside of these constraints set you up for an unnecessary downfall (think 4 audiences in a year versus 50).

Timely – Providing a time frame gives your goal life.  A time frame adds the elements of urgency and closure.  There’s nothing more concise and motivating than a crystal clear drop dead date.

Take Action

The last section of this article is without a doubt the most important piece.  Taking action is essential to getting off your butt and making things happen.  Creating time and setting goals are both important but they mean nothing if no action follows them.

Right after I finished losing weight a close friend of mine asked me how I did it.  I looked him squarely in the eye and said “I went to the gym and worked out”.  He thought I was trying to be smart, but I was giving him the absolute truth.  I wouldn’t have lost a pound had I not done the work.

It’s a simple yet important piece of advice.  If you want to lose weight you need to eat right and workout.  If you want to be the top salesman you need to sell the most product.  If you want to get more dates with women you need to talk to more women.  If you want to attract customers into your business then create a marketing plan and implement it.  If you absolutely hate your job then find a new one.

Get it?

Got it?

Good.

Taking action is really the easiest part of the equation.  Setting time and creating goals are tedious (yet necessary) activities.  Putting your nose to the grind stone and reaping the benefits is the fun part.

Remember the Nike slogan (Just Do It!) and you can’t go wrong.

Conclusion

Getting off your butt and breaking the shackles of procrastination can be challenging.  Many people struggle with this.  I used to be a part of that crowd until I began following the steps outlined in this article.

Here’s a quick recap:

  1. Create non-negotiable blocks of productive time
  2. Set S.M.A.R.T. goals
  3. Take Action!

Sitting on your hands watching the world spin is an incredible waste of your time and talent.  Use these tips to get off your butt and start using what you have!

Please Note: This was a guest post by Marcus Smith. Here is some more of his posts: The Audience Wants You to Be a Star and You Speak To the Public Each Day

If you would like to write a guest post, get extra traffic and exposure for your blog, click here.

Click HERE to get my FREE E-Book and Learn How to Become Successful in Every Area of Your Life Starting Today.

 

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From Lame To Fame - 5 Steps

Wednesday, August 20th, 2008

After my How To Become Great article got a lot of interest I decided to explore the concept of success some more.  Consider the following:

  • Most of us are born with similar financial resources (most of a countrie’s population falls into the poor or lower-middle class)
  • Most of us are born with a similar amount of time (70 years is the average life-span the last I checked)
  • Most of us have access to all the information and learning resources we’ll ever need.  This was first started by public libraries where anyone could read a book and learn basically anything.  And more recently has exploded through the internet where you can do a quick search and in seconds find the info you are looking for

So why do a few of us become great while most are just average? There are many factors which I highlight in several of my posts:

However the biggest most common roadblock to success is FEAR. Yes the big “F” word ;)  Fear is such a roadblock to success on so many levels that an article such as this one couldn’t possibly cover it all.

Our fears are often a freak show.  We hide them, we work around them and we never really wanna face them.  Yet they are often what holds us back in life.  And no I’m not talking about your fear of snakes or spiders.  Although that does remind me of a funny prank I played on a friend once with a leather snake ;)

I’m talking about fear of rejection, fear of failure, fear of social settings, fear of success, fear of fame, fear of attention, and so on.  I’m sure you can at least relate to a couple of those fears and would agree that they have sabotaged your life in many ways.

For example, fear of rejection can really sabotage your dating life, whether you are a man or a woman.  If you are a man and you are scared of rejection you will never really ask out any women you find attractive.  If you are a woman and you are scared from a man rejecting you, you will never really be able to trust men in the first place.

So how do you go from lame or average to fame or greatness, well you need to conquer your fears, and here are 5 steps that will help you tremendously:

  1. Be FearlessDo it, don’t just think it. Instead of saying “I’m not scared” or “I wanna get over my fear of…” just do it.  You might need to take small steps at first but you need to do it.  One thing I always wanted to do was skydive.  When the opportunity came up I decided to just do it.  Now of course this might sound a bit extreme, however it was a blast.  In most cases though I notice I have taken gradual steps to get over my fear.A big fear for me was fear of rejection especially around strangers in social settings.  And it still is to a lesser degree.  To get over that I started by first learning everything about social skills I could find. I then went out and would make eye contact with strangers on the street.  Then I would try smiling.  Then I actually started saying “hi how are you” to strangers.  Now I’m at the point where I can comfortably walk up to any stranger and probably have a fun 10-15 minute conversation.The key is getting out of your comfort zone and taking gradual scary steps.  You have to be fearless not to try.  You have to fake it until you make it.  Start doing scary things and your body will gradually find them less scary.
  2. Don’t Care Most of the things we care about or worry about are very insignificant.  Most of our worries never become reality anyways.  Think about it when was the last time you actually worried about something and had it really happen? I would guess 1 out of your last 100 worries turned into reality.Often we care too much about pleasing others.  We care too much about how we come across. We care too much about our pride and ego.  We try to follow our parents guidance and advice, and we really do care about being good sons and daughters. Well I say forget that.I’m not saying become a jerk, I’m just saying that if you are always putting others and their needs before yours you are not being authentic.  You aren’t being real.  You are trying to live a pretend life and project a pretend lifestyle.

    Start being real.  If that means that you will offend some people so be it.  If that means that some of your current friends might dump you for it, then oh well you’ll make new ones.  If that actually happens it means that they are probably losers in the first place and aren’t good success models to start with.

    When you actually start being real and more authentic something amazing happens.  You notice that your relationships with others become a lot stronger.  Even people who don’t agree with you will start trusting you more, and be open around you.  Why?  Because they know the real you, they know you got boundaries, and people actually respect that.

  3. Burn the Boats It’s a known fact that many successful tribes and warriors burned their boats right after they landed on their enemies grounds.  They burned their ships and basically made it impossible to flee the war that they are about to engage in other than victoriously.  They either fought and all died, or they were victorious and took over the land and everything in it.If you are trying to become successful in any area of your life you need to burn the boats.  You need to make it so that failure isn’t an option.  I know that sounds nice and all but I bet you are asking, “how the hack do I do that?”  Here is a practical example.Changing career paths.  You decide you want to change your career path.  So how do you burn the boats or cut off any hope of staying in your current job?  You first tell all of your friends and relatives about your decision. Because now if you wont follow through they’ll probably hassle you about it.  You get some guidance on how to start in your new career of choice.  If you already have some money saved up that you can live off for a few months, you might even consider quitting your job tomorrow. Because once you quit there is no going back. You start getting a resume ready and even maybe start applying to jobs in your new career path.
  4. Nothing To Lose Everything To GainRemind yourself “I got nothing to lose and everything to gain”. How come?  Think about it. You created your current lifestyle, everything you have, all your accomplishment, financial wealth, relationships, connections and so on.  If all of those were to be taken away from you, using the same logic, you can get them all back in time.  So no matter what kind of risks you take you really have nothing to lose and everything to gain.  You can always come back to your little comfort zone.  However by stepping up, and taking risks you really do have everything to gain.  The world is yours for the taking.
  5. Shatter Glass WallThe glass wall is the sum of all of our limiting beliefs and insecurities that hold us back in life.  When I was too shy to talk to strangers I had a very thick glass wall.  I thought strangers wouldn’t be nice to me.  I though they didn’t want to talk to me.  I thought they didn’t want anything I had to offer.  I thought I would annoy them. And so on.I had to shatter that glass wall which was mostly based on my own insecurities.  To shatter it I had to start acting in spite of my insecurities.  I had to feel the fear and do it anyways.

    You first step to shattering your glass wall is becoming more aware of it.  You have to start seeing it for what it is, a bunch of insecurities and limiting beliefs.  It’s called a glass wall because it’s often invisible.  Often we assume that we are right, things are they way we’ve always been taught and we never question our beliefs and insecurities.

For more success tips to go from lame to fame subscribe to my success rss feed to stay up to date on future success tips ;)

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Forget Success - Try to Fail Instead

Thursday, July 31st, 2008

Say what? This is a great piece of advice I heard originally from Steve Pavlina the Personal Development expert. He was asked how being an authority on personal development impacts his own personal growth? If he ever feels intimidated, as if he can’t fail and always has to be successful to be a good role model.

His reply was simple: “think of authority as authenticity“. This hit deep home for me. One of the biggest challenges about writing personal development articles is feeling like a hypocrite.  How can I give weight loss advice when it’s something I myself I’m working on still?  How can I write about biphasic sleep when I couldn’t finish my own experiment with it?

What we often do is hold our deepest darkest secrets and failures inside of us.  This creates an overwhelming feeling of guilt and shame.  And it holds us back from being authentic.  Think of authenticity as a glass wall, you can see through it. An authentic person is very transperant.

Everyone can easily relate to an authentic person.  An authentic person isn’t usually the picture perfect success model.  Rather he’s the biggest failure ever.  He’s open about his short-comings, and past failures.  People as a result feel like they can relate to him, rather than putting him on a pedastal.

Failure is what breaks our egos.  Failure is what helps us get beyond our pride, our sense of superiority, our perfectionism.  Failure is what helps us learn and grow.

Immediate success usually leads to lots of trouble.  Look at the hollywood stars or pop music artists that make it, and go crazy with all the new money, power and fame.  Often they abuse drugs or alcohol.  I personqally can’t blame them, if you can buy your way out of anything, how much trouble would you get yourself into?

Does that mean that success is bad?  Certainly not.  But success has to be earned.  Otherwise it doesn’t last and more importantly can’t be fulfilling.  Hear the statistic that most lottery winners are usually in more debt a few years after winning than they were before?

Try to fail as quickly and as cheaply as possible to grow the quickest.  An easy way to fail is to get out of your comfort zone.  Outside of your comfort zone is where all the growth happens.  Just think of the last tough skill you learned.  Remember those first few days of constantly trying and failing?

Some quick ways to get out of your comfort zone:

  • Try to learn a new skill or take on a new hobby, the more intimidating the better.  Try a dancing class, an improv comedy class, or skydiving.  All great activities I tried and highly recommend ;)
  • Make new friends.  Start talking to new random people on the street, at social events, in the elevator.  Meet some new neighbors.  Talk with people you usually avoid.  This will help you get a broader perspective on life.  It will also help you relate to different kinds of people with different backgrounds.
  • Travel.  Travel internationally if possible.  Otherwise travel to big cities and small town in your country.  Any kind of travel is a learning experience.  Me and friend promised each other to travel once every 3 months and it’s been amazing.  We went to Las Vegas in March where he somehow made $400 playing roulette.  Then we went to Los Angeles for a seminar where I got to meet some of the biggest internet entrepreneurs ;) I gotta admit it was a very humbling experience.

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20 Tips to Create Value Like a Millionaire

Thursday, June 12th, 2008

Wanna become a millionaire? All you gotta do is create value for others.  Whether you want to create the next cool electronic gadget, the next best selling book, the next medical break-through, or simply help others just for the fun of it, all you gotta do is work on creating value for others. Creating value is simply building or creating something that others find valuable.  Something that improves the quality of their life, helps them break a bad habit or simply gives them pleasure.  And here are all the tips you need to create value.

  1. Understand Value.  Value is in the eye of the beholder. What you think is valuable is great, however others might not necessarily care for it ;) So how do you create value?
  2. Target a Group.  Since value differs from one person to the next you need to focus.  Focus your efforts on a group that has a certain need.  Maybe they want to lose weight, learn Irish-dancing, get a date, travel the world, or stop smoking.  Whatever need that group has, focus on that need, and create value with that group in mind. What would they find valuable?
  3. Put Others Needs First.  Once you’ve focused on a group, you need to put the group’s needs first before your own.  Let’s say you decided to help lame guys - myself included ;) - get a date. While it would be pretty funny to take them out and tell them to approach women with some obscene comments, and see the women’s reactions, guess what? That will probably traumatize the guys.  Instead you need to try seeing things through their eyes, see what they need and offer it.
  4. Master the Skills.  In order to help that guy get a date, you have to be able to get one first, I know it stinks but talk is cheap ;) You have to lead by example. However you don’t need to master a skill before you can start.  If you can get more dates than the average guy, then you can start helping average dudes.
  5. Don’t Judge.  In creating value you have to be very open minded.  If you have a lot of judgments, no one will listen to you, or want your help.  If you look down on those you’re trying to help, this will become obvious sooner or later.  So how do you become more open-minded?
  6. Walk in Their Shoes. Whatever group you are trying to help, you must really know and understand very well before you can create anything of value for them.  An easy way to do that is to frequently speak with members of the group, hang out with them, or even spend a whole day with one them.
  7. Become Creative.  Maybe you want to help others lose weight yet you realize that there are already tons of books, diets and programs out there.  How could you create value in such a crowded market? While there are many solutions, guess what? Most people are still overweight, so obviously most of the solutions out there aren’t working.  So what’s missing? That’s what you need to figure out.
  8. Laser Focus. Maybe trying to help others lose weight sounds like a huge project. This is why you need to focus your efforts. Maybe you should help new mothers drop the weight they gained during pregnancy.  Now that’s a much easier project for you to focus on and learn about.
  9. Start Reading. Once you picked a group of interest, and narrowed your focus down, you need to start reading about that group.  Find out what solutions are out there for their need, and find out if those solutions are working.  Often times you will find that there are many solutions, yet none of them is very effective.  This is when you know you found an opportunity :)
  10. Offer Free Help.  Since you are no expert, no one will probably be willing to pay you for help. Lucky for you, people never turn down FREE help.  So you have to pick your first victim ;) I mean client and offer them some help. Maybe you remember that your cousin’s wife just had a baby and is now trying to drop off those last few pounds. So next time you talk to her, you let her know that you would like a walking partner, and go for walks with her. During the walks you can get to find out about her experience dropping off those pregnancy pounds, and even give her some tips from some of the books you read.
  11. Start a Support Group.  Once you have had some success helping someone, then start helping others, eventually create some kind of a support group. This could be an online forum, a group that meets over dinner at a restaurant, or even a group that has a teleconference.
  12. Take Notes. Take notes on what you learn about your support group members.  Their needs, techniques that helped them succeed, their frustrations etc. This will help you create a valuable product for them in the future.
  13. Start Creating Your Product. Based on what you learn start creating a product that would help the group you chose to focus on.
  14. Use Your Skills.  Creating a product might sound like a big deal yet it’s a lot easier than most people think.  You can simply write an ebook or create a video.  Going back to helping new mothers drop off pregnancy pounds, all you need to do is get a personal trainer from your local gym to come up with a custom workout based on your findings/research etc.  You can even videotape the personal trainer performing it, and that could be your product.  You can outsource the video manufacturing and copying, just do a quick google search and you’ll find many duplication services.
  15. Test Your Product. Before selling your product, or investing a lot of money in creating a 100 units of it, test it within the support group you created.
  16. Listen to The Feedback.  Listen to the feedback you get during your product testing and adjust your product accordingly.
  17. Finalize Product. Once you have created a more ideal product that members of the support group enjoy, it’s time to go live.
  18. Do Not Become a Perfectionist.  You should not be aiming for creating the perfect product, rather one that’s good enough.  You can always improve it later.
  19. Get Some Free Testimonials.  Have some members of your support group try out your product, and get some testimonials from them.  This will help you in making your sales pitch.
  20. Start Selling Your Product.  Make a sales pitch, present the product to investors, or even sell it directly to potential customers.

I realize that this is rather a quick outline of how value is created.  However if you are interested in learning more about this topic, provide me with your first name and email, and I will explore it much deeper.

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I Don’t Feel Like It

Tuesday, April 22nd, 2008

Lazy Lion
image source: 4StringsGood

You know you need to finish some errands yet you don’t feel like it, so you decide you’ll just do them tomorrow. You know you should go to the gym in order to stay in line with your fitness goals, yet you don’t feel like it, so you decide to skip your workout and watch TV instead. You have some free time and you know you should work on that new business idea you had the other day, yet you are tired and don’t feel like it, so you go to bed early instead. You are out at a social event and you see a very attractive member of the opposite sex that you wish to meet, yet you feel scared to walk over and say hi, so you just talk yourself out of doing it by assuming it would be awkward and socially unacceptable. You are at a fast food restaurant and you know you should order a healthy salad, yet you are sick of eating healthy food, so you rationalize that you deserve a cheat meal and order a cheeseburger instead. You are sick of your current job and know you should start applying elsewhere, yet you don’t feel like going through the interviewing process, it will be too much work, so you decide to put it off until next month and you rationalize that would be better timing anyways.

I don’t feel like it. It’s scary, I don’t want to do it. I’m too tired, I’ll just do it tomorrow. I deserve a break, I’ve been working too hard, besides I can always take care of this later. We all experience the “I don’t feel like it” syndrome for one reason or the other. Sometimes the reason is very legitimate, you could of had a long day, a few hours of sleep the night before, and are really exhausted and therefore feel like relaxing or going to bed early instead of taking care of those errands you had on your to-do list. Other times you simply are in a lazy state of mind, and don’t feel like doing anything, and therefore decide you deserve a break and you watch tv or uselessly surf the web for an hour or two.

I don’t feel like it. I have a confession to make, I don’t really feel like writing this post. It’s the weekend, I’ve had a pretty hectic/busy week, and I would rather just relax today. I need to clarify, I really like blogging and writing, and whenever I start writing I enter into a flow zone where I get absorbed into it, and the words just flow out, it’s a great feeling :) However there are times where I simply feel lazy, tired or too out of it to start writing. During such times I can usually come up with great reasons/rationalizations for why I shouldn’t write. Here is one, “writing is my hobby, it should not feel like a job, I should just put it off until I really feel like it”. There is some truth to this reasoning, so lets say I putt off writing, and don’t feel like it the next day, and the day after that etc. Would I just shut down this blog, and move on to the next thing?

I think you are getting my point here, on certain occasions if we are over-worked, exhausted, doing way too much etc. we legitimately need to take a break, however more often than not we get lazy and just don’t feel like doing whatever it is we know we have to do. We make commitments to take on this or that new habit, and we know the work involved, yet when it’s time to do it we simply don’t feel like it.

So what’s the solution. Naturally one would ask well how can I get myself to feel like exercising, writing, or doing my errands. There are several answers, one can look for motivational sources, readings etc. One can get a workout buddy, an accountability buddy etc. One can make a public commitment, for example I can commit to writing a new post everyday on this blog for the next 30 days. However none of these solutions are complete. While they are all great ideas, and would make you feel more pressure to get things done, there is still something missing. Lets say you do get a workout buddy, you might feel motivated to work out with your buddy for the first 2 weeks. However on the 3rd week your buddy is out of town on a business trip. Additionally you get a mild cold, and while physically you can do a light workout, you don’t feel like it, besides being sick is a legitimate reason to skip working out and your buddy would understand when he gets back. So you skip working out for the next couple of days. On the 3rd day you feel fine, however you don’t feel like working out and you rationalize I should rest one more day just to make sure the cold is fully gone and out of my body. You use this same reasoning to skip working out for the rest of the week. All of a sudden you realize you just skipped a whole week without going to the gym.

Of course one can get multiple workout partners to avoid this situation, however life will always throw circumstances at you, and there will be times where you just feel lazy and will come up with great reasons to relax and put off tasks. So what’s the solution, if you can’t really get red of “I don’t feel like it” syndrome, how can you live with it, how can you manage it? What about very successful entrepreneurs that work 10-14 hour days for months or even years to get a business of the ground? How do they do it? What about Olympic athletes that train for several hours a day for months to get in top shape, how do they do it?

Very successful people, who live amazing lives, and leave a legacy tend to usually do the right thing whether or not they feel like it. This in a way is like a muscle that they grow and strengthen. You can start developing this great habit today by following these steps:

  1. When you know you should do something and don’t feel like it, accept this and realize that everyone goes through it. Don’t be hard on yourself.
  2. From today decide that you will just do the right thing, and do whatever it is you have to do whether or not you fee like it.
  3. Realize that there will still be times where you will get lazy, or not do the right thing. That’s okay, you are building a new habit, this is expected. Don’t be a perfectionist, you simply can’t always do the right thing 100% of the time. Accept this. Your goal should be to do right more often as time goes on. Think of this as a muscle you are developing in the gym. If you currently do the right actions 5% of the time, and can increase that to 10% in the next year, then you would double your results, progress, and success.
  4. When you have a long tedious task in front of you, don’t stress about it. Just start doing it and stay in the present moment. Don’t think about the 2, 3 or 4 more hours you have to keep doing this for, instead think about what you are doing at this moment. Say you have to wash 50 dishes, when you grab that first dish, just focus on your hand, the circular motions it’s taking to wash that dish, the feeling of the water and the smell of the soap. Don’t think about the other 49 dishes, stay in the moment instead of worrying about the future. This is a great method I learned from Alan Watts. Another way to slow down and enjoy the moment is by monitoring your breathing.
  5. Make whatever you are doing fun. This is another method that I learned from Alan Watts. Try singing, or humming as you are washing the dishes. Make up a new rhyme about the soapy dopey dishes ;)
  6. Realize that doing the right thing no matter how you feel becomes easier the more you do it. Lets say you don’t feel like going to the gym and you do it anyway. The next day you don’t feel like it, it will be easier for you to ignore the emotion and go.

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